So, I know it’s like, mere days before Chapter 15 (episode 2 of season 3) of Eastbound & Down, but after much deliberation, I decided I must recap the episodes of what is expected to be the last season of my favorite show on television. I need to tell you two things before we get under way.
1. So as not to be too much of a spoiler to those who haven’t seen the following episode yet, I’ve limited these recaps to a “Who’s Fucking In, Who’s Fucking Out” power points system. The setup is very simple: If a character on the show does something that’s fucking righteous, then he or she gets points for being “Fucking In”. If the vice versa happens, and a character displays uncool or pussy-ish behavior, he or she gets points docked, and perilously becomes closer to being “Fucking Out”. Points will be tallied all the way to the end of the season, and both the ultimate victor and ultimate loser will be revealed. Fun, right?
2. Some of you out there may not watch Eastbound and Down for moral reasons, or for the singular fact that you don’t have cable right now. For those in the latter category, I feel your pain. Cable’s fucking expensive, I know! Like I mentioned before, these recaps aren’t meant to be total spoilers, so feel free to peak and participate via the comments section if you want. Let me be your steward in this journey through Kenny Powers’ psyche. For those of you that actually refuse to watch this show for ethical reasons…we’re kind of running out of shit to say to each other. Gettin’ a little awkward. Let’s call it a wash, and just enjoy the rest of the blog.
Now, let’s get to it. You know what I think you need? I think I should call a fuckin’ sitter. And then you and I should go out for a bomb-ass evening in fucking Myrtle Beach, proper, fuckin’ awesome-style. I think it would do you and I both some good to get out and have some fun without the baby pulling us down for once. I think I’m getting tongue-tied here. Basically, I think it’s high time you set that pussy free. Set it free. Set that pussy free.
